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A year later, Jairus fell in love with Natalie, who Chris had known for a long time.

The four of us worked hard to grow into a makeshift family, marathoning television shows and going on international adventures.

But my desire to see him in the middle of his busy work week made me impulsively offer to bring him a tea one day.

Getting there was a struggle, and I arrived shaky and in tears.

But then I swiped right based entirely on the power of this guy's grin.

I quickly found myself in conversation with a dark-haired dreamboat named Robin.

I was charmed by how funny he was and how much he clearly cared about things.

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Within a few minutes we'd made plans to have dinner the following Wednesday.

It's buoying for me to feel so much love all around me and to be part of such a great team of people who all have each other's best interests at heart.

(It's also pretty great to have met so many hot men with both a beard and a high tolerance for how funny I find my own jokes.)None of this is to say that it's a cakewalk. And while non-monogamous ones aren't necessarily harder, they do have unique challenges.

I was already in a relationship, and though my then-partner had previously been non-monogamous, I didn't think it was a good fit for me: I panic about people keeping secrets and choosing others over me.

But on our first lunch together, I was as taken with Jairus's long eyelashes as with his willingness to talk about childhood challenges.

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