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The top of the bleach bottle surprisingly had a cock ring effect and I was stuck.

I figured that after a while I would lose my erection and the bleach bottle would fall off, but much to my dismay I found that I didn't fully clean the bleach from the bottle because my cock started burning bad! My mother came home to find her son hugging a pillow.

I was 17, a junior in high school, starting point guard on the basketball team, and headed to Veil with my family for a winter ski trip.

She was asleep bed when I came over at about 5am and snuck through her window.

It was some time before I came and it was a mind-blowing orgasm, but little did I know that there was a couple of bits of toast and a cup of tea on my bedside cabinet which my mother must have placed while I was enjoying myself! As soon as I completed the task, I passed out cold, my "evidence" all over my now-bare chest.

I told her I must have sleepwanked and it was common! The next thing I remember is my mother yelling from the staircase, which led directly into our living room.

As I got up (slowly and in a daze) I realized what I loser I was.

Now to make matters worse, I went to take a step toward the stairs to go up to bed and flipped through the air onto my face/chest/etc.

So I found a nicely sized carrot and took a shower.

My sister also knows the story, but was too young to appreciate it.

She brings it up from time to time just to make sure I don't forget what I loser I am. Mom mops up One time I masturbated after coming back from a night out. The next morning my mom entered the room and asked me what that was on the floor.

She said she'd always thought I was a tosser anyway!! She's yelling, "Mikey, get down here, your son's on drugs," blah, blah, blah.

I began to wake up and I realized I was pretty much laying on the floor naked, Playboy still going, and that I was still wasted, of course. By the time I raised my head, they were staring at me from the staircase.

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