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But she had taken a computer course when she was pregnant, and even though her preterm labor prevented her from finishing it, she parlayed her new skills into a contracting job with Intel.

"Having Hailey was my motivation to make it happen," she says.

Be prepared for any number of uncomfortable situations, from disapproving grandparents to gossiping coworkers.

You may grow distant from some friends while drawing closer to others.

Fortunately, I had a fantastic group of friends who helped.

Maybe none of them knew exactly what I was going through, but they babysat and showered Mae with love, which I appreciate to this day. were born outside of marriage, according to the Centers for Disease Control.

"And she was right."There are single moms who get reliable, substantial child-support payments from the baby's father.

But if reading that sentence makes you laugh ruefully, you're probably one of the majority of women who have become the breadwinner."My son counts on me and only me," Zola says.

"You have the rest of your life to plot and plan."You'll still have fears, of course, so confide in friends and family who give you sound advice and who don't panic.

After a time, I got back on my feet and ventured out. A lot more single moms than I had ever noticed before. It's an all-time high -- and it's not due to teen moms (teen motherhood is at its lowest rate in 65 years).

Births to unmarried women ages 25 to 29 are up 30 percent since 1991; births to unmarried women ages 30 to 44 are up 17 percent.

One caveat: Statistics don't tell how many single moms are with a partner (and choosing not to get married), how many live with family (so they have some help around), and how many are truly alone.

But the point is, there are a lot of single moms out there. Even so, single mothers agree that even when overwhelmed, there's usually a way to work out problems.




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