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Name: Cara Liebowitz, 23City: Long Island, New York Disabilities: Cerebral palsy, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and asthma Job: Freelance writer and blogger Her biggest dating challenges: Honestly? It’s really hard to maintain a romantic relationship (never mind sexual), when you hardly ever see the person. Will I have enough battery power in my scooter to get there and back?

So whenever I make plans, I have to plan it with military precision: Where are we going? Even the closest relationships, geographically, can feel like long-distance relationships to me because it takes so much planning and so much energy.

But many able-bodied daters may not know how to approach someone with a disability or what to avoid when asking a disabled person out. We talked to five people with disabilities and asked them about dating ups and downs, tips for other daters with disabilities, and what able-bodied people can do differently in relationships.

Here’s what they said: Name: Ariella Barker, 35City: Charlotte, North Carolina Disability: Spinal Muscular Atrophy Job: Attorney, former law professor, Ms. How she approaches disability and dating: In my opinion, we all have a disability in some way.

In a world built for the able-bodied, disabled people face countless barriers in their everyday lives.

Dating can be even more challenging, then, for the woman who has to spend every first date explaining how she “ended up” in a wheelchair or the man who receives pitying glances as he gives his date a rose. Census statistics in 2012, one in five people Americans has a disability and more than half consider their disability severe, but physical and cognitive limitations don't stop those with disabilities from enjoying dating and having meaningful, lasting relationships.

On dating other people with disabilities: Dating men with mobility impairments makes having physical contact a challenge.

With a wheelchair or two coming in between our physical bodies and separating us in physical distance, cuddling and holding hands while watching a movie or riding on the bus are impossible.

dating disabled people-56dating disabled people-3

How his first relationship changed his perspective: My whole life, I felt like I was never going to be desired.

Men who can't part from their mothers, men who cried like children at the drop of a hat, men who were one-minute men or selfish in bed, men who couldn't get a job, and grown men who still lived at home with their parents. On dating able-bodied men: The struggle is the sense of feeling inferior, particularly with regard to his family or friends.

Hearing others praise your boyfriend for being such a saint to date the crippled girl and constantly trying never to burden my boyfriend with anything, for fear he would think that I'm a burden.

Maybe it's not a disability that falls under the legal definition and maybe it's not visible.

But I have dated men who were weaker in character than I am physically.




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