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As is your duty, you immediately break it.“Any other assholes out there ready to teleport onto our little slice of paradise? John ‘shit taste’ Egbert was here, and we missed him? He’s the Sandra Bullock to our collective Daniel Day Lewis and we got to the airport five seconds too late in some bullshit twist.” Strider shoves his hands into the pockets of his undeserved god-pajamas.

Anyone just soiling their pants for the opportunity to socialize with this tight-knit community of barely-sentient organic sacks this side of the Furthest Ring? “You think you know a guy and then he flips everything turnways by subverting the quintessential trope.

You sit up and rub at your cranial plate before swiping behind you to grab the offending bucket.

You gingerly reach into the vulgar receptacle, carefully avoiding any direct contact, and remove the note.

Sure enough, the air has once again been ripped open, and out pops a carapacian. ”Dave crouches down to turn the body over to reveal rivulets of red, and it takes the remains of your self-control to keep your scream internal. Between the and Egbert’s fickle ass teleporting wherever the fuck—”“Wait, hold the fuck up— John was here?

It lands on the roof of the meteor with a dull thud, and for a moment, silence descends. Actually, physically here in all his wide-eyed gooberish glory?

In fact you’re about to charge into some flagrantly emotional tantrum you’re sure to regret later when, out of nowhere, what seems to be a rip in the fabric of space bursts into the air in front of you.

Who you have half a chance of running into whenever you bumble through a series of ‘dream bubbles’, apparently, or who you may never see again, so then again, maybe you can't!

“Before you even ask, KK, we’re still friends.”The flash of irritation you feel is immediate and familiar. The answer to a question that didn't even cross my think pan. Maybe finally getting rid of you will actually get my life turned around, now that I won't have the biggest douche from the vestigial detritus of Alternia for a best friend.” You might've been more convincing as a vitriolic verbal virtuoso if you didn't start clinging to him as if you’re an arboreal beast seeking foliage and he’s the last tree in existence. Does it have rockets or something I don’t know about? It’s kind of touching, since this is the greatest range of emotion you think you’ve ever seen from her, but also, it’s kind of incredibly terrifying. “What, so just one “push” is going to last three years? ”“Troll Isaac Newton told him.” Lalonde has the exact type of smug self-satisfaction that communicates she’s sharing a terrible inside joke with herself that no one else is clever enough to— oh, okay, or Strider could smirk to join in on the fun. Who needs interspecies cooperation when you have shitty exclusive jokes. You don’t have time to throw a proper tantrum because suddenly everyone’s preparing for takeoff.

” Terezi grips her cane, twisting her mouth into an unreadable expression.

“You know, this was what I was trying to prevent.”“It sounds like you’re aware that this is not the ideal scenario for a final showdown. ”“Don’t tell me that bucket left a dent in your think pan! I’m sure I can speak for everyone on this rock when I say we don’t have time to indulge whatever sentimental bullshit you’re preoccupied with.”“You can just take your fairy sparkle bullshit and fuck right off.

But you guess you can understand and respect the decision of your half-living bro.

Terezi’s laughing too, and isn’t that just an additional kick to your already bruised shame globes.




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